I was sitting in Barnes and Noble. Usually I find a quiet corner of the store and get all settled in there, but for some reason I was compelled to move today and sit in the cafe.
While I was sitting in the cafe, I started thinking. I thought about my friends and family. I thought about someone I’m really missing and how to get them back. I thought about who I am. I thought about LAMN. I thought about my life. I thought about why I’m here. I was thinking a lot, and in the middle of my thinking I would tap on my laptop and play with my sketchbook a little, answering texts every once in awhile. While I was spacing out, old men sat around me sipping on their coffees and picking at their blueberry muffins.
Suddenly the old guy sitting directly to my right said, “you’re making a lot of noise over there.”
I was kind of puzzled, I had been in such a deep daze it took me a moment to figure out that he was indeed talking to me. With the puzzled look still glued to my face, I lifted my head and said, “oh, pardon?”
He had a newspaper spread out all over his small cafe table, with some pages drooping on the floor. He ruffled them as he spread the pages between his fingers and looked through his glasses at me and said, “do you know how?” I finally began catching on a little bit more at this point and replied, “no, how?”
He lifted his hands from his newspaper and I followed them with my eyes as he brought them up to his ears and begin twisted them around. “With your brain,” he paused, “it’s going click click click click click.” He had wrinkles around his eyes where the skin crinkled when he smiled.
I smiled at him then and said, “oh.” He must’ve sensed that I still didn’t really understand because he then added very matter-o-factly, “you’re thinking. A lot.”
I smiled largely at the fact that a random stranger had figured me out. I nodded yes as I looked down at my lap and replied, “yes. You’re right.”
I thought to myself for a single moment and when I looked up again, he was gone.
The crinkly newspaper that had been sprawled all over the small cafe table, was gone. The old man, gone. Nothing there to show that he had even existed.
I looked around expecting to find him somewhere, but he was nowhere to be seen. Only a few seconds after I scanned the area around me. A very young man came walking behind me and stared me in the eyes and said simply, “how are you today?”
I replied without thinking, I’m great.
He walked away, and my head felt all the pressure from the focusing I had been doing moments before.
I’m still trying to figure out what just happened.
I was in the car driving to Barnes and Noble and a quote popped into my head.
(While I was typing that, I accidentally put two o’s inside the word popped instead of two p’s. Now I can’t stop giggling thinking how funny that would’ve sounded if a quote pooped into my head. Poop is never not funny.)
But it was the quote that goes something along the lines of, “today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.” Think about that for awhile. It’s deep. Put it under your pillow and sleep on it. You’ll have that “aha!” moment soon enough. I think that’s one of my favorite quotes. Recently I’ve been thinking that despite my appreciation for life, I nevertheless continue to take life for granted. I understand it’s a part of being human but I’m not loving it. I feel like recently I’ve been worrying so much about my future and myself. I’ve stopped giving as much to others because I’ve just been wanting to receive. So I’ve issued a change within myself. I’ve been volunteering, and interning, all for free. Not expecting anything of any sorts in return. I haven’t even been counting the community hours I’ve been giving because I’m not doing it for the hours. I’m helping for the pure satisfaction of helping other people. I love that feeling.
So I woke up this morning, my mission to go to Barnes and Noble and spend all day just hanging out like I normally do. On the way there I stopped by the mall to grab some lunch at Asian Chao (yum.) This is where my inspiring day started. The lady giving out the food was sparsely giving food to other people, she was barely filling up their plate. But for some reason when it came to me being next in line she filled my plate up to the brim. Maybe she thought I looked too thin or maybe she did it completely by accident. But I appreciated it nonetheless and it kind of made me feel a teensy bit more chipper.
I dropped my phone in its cheap case on the floor when I was setting my food down on the table, and the case cracked. I’ve been wanting to get a new case for awhile, and I remembered seeing a phone case stand earlier while we were standing in line. So I figured it can’t hurt to see how much they cost. When I walked over there, the guy who was working the booth asked if I needed help with anything and I kindly asked him where the iPhone cases were. He showed them to me and then whispered in a hushed tone that if I bought one he would give me another one for free. Along with a free screen protector. Okay, I know that sounds like he was totally just pulling one over on a naive girl like myself but he really sounded very genuine about it.
I ended up getting two iphone cases and a screenprotector for 29.99. Maybe he was just being a really good salesperson. But I like to believe he was doing something nice for someone. They’re awesomely awesome looking cases by the way, I’ll definitely post some pix later. I also managed to find out he was here from Israel, he had the coolest accent. My stepdad Dylan thinks I’m beyond naive, but whatever Dylan. He just doesn’t have faith in people.
Then getting to Barnes and noble, I figured just for the hell of it, I was going to ask for an application while I was by guest services looking up a book for a friend. The lady was beyond sweet and gave me a tip that if I had any cafe experience, they were looking for positions for the Starbucks section of the store as well. I borrowed a pen and found a table and began filling it out. I saw a little note that said I could attach a resume. I decided, hey, if I’m going to apply I don’t want to apply half-ass. I’m definitely going to bring the application back with my resume. I almost didn’t even go to return the pen. I almost put it in my bag with my application and went on my way to wander the bookstore. But for some reason something pushed me to go back to the guest services counter. I saw the lady who had lent me the pen talking to someone and I held out my hand with the pen. She looked at me and said, “finished with your application?”
I shook my head and told her I wanted to attach my resume and after those words left my lips the lady she had been talking to looked at me and said, “You’re applying for a job? Great.” and held out her hand. She was the manager. I introduced myself and we chatted a little. She told me to make sure when I bring back my application that I bring it to a manager. I will do Mrs. Manager Lady!
Hoorah for kindness!
So here’s my advice to you, dear reader, go with your gut feeling and do things that may have no benefit to you whatsoever. Just do it. Today is the best day of your life and you only have this very moment of this very day for sure. Treat it that way.